Sing at the Bing – 29,5,16

The Pumphy Music festival, or Bingstock, was a great success but was marred by the death of a well liked Pumphy man, Eric Clark. I remember Eric fixing my Dad’s old Austin Cambridge, Morris Oxford and old Wolsley – you only see these old cars on ‘Time Team’, now, dug up in a Romano – British settlement. I was so sorry to hear about Eric, but knowing him as I did, the last thing he probably did was tell a joke and leave whoever he’d just told it to with a smile on his or her face. The actual event went well and the combination of Live Music and friendly familiar faces made for a great day. The Cawburn was bouncing, too, although I’ll not be back as the Orangina’s complained about ‘Sunshine on Leith’ getting played on the Karaoke and it was stopped. I felt awfy all day and was sick at night. I’ve not felt great since chemo last week and there’s more tomorrow and a cancer jag on Tuesday – another PET scan next Tuesday and a possible spleen Biopsy after that and, hopefully France with Davy B. F–k Cancer and the Rangers.

The cancer Diaries – 24,5,16 -cancer and Pink Floyd

Well, I got my big scan result a week earlier than expected and it was mixed to say the least. I am responding well to the new chemo, the lumps and bumps on the outside have gone and the cancer on the inside has receded. My blood counts are as good as they’ve been since all the treatment began and my heart has made a good recovery since my Heart attack. However, the scan showed up a shadow on my spleen which may or may not be more Lymphoma. If this is the case, it is apparently quite serious and I think they want to batter on with a bit more chemo and start the stem cell treatment within a Month. I will know on Friday if the Spleen is looking cancery and I’ll need a Biopsy for that fairly soon. The Doctor dropped a bombshell when he said I’ll probably have to cancel the holiday to France with Davy for the Fitba’. I will definitely fight my corner on that One. The Doctor said that in the build up to the stem cell treatment there will be visits to St Jocks and the Festern General almost every week, but surely a week in France won’t do any harm – IS will probably kill us anyway. Three per Cent of the people who go through the treatment die and my way of thinking is that I could die if I go on holiday but I could die if I don’t. Also, I don’t fancy not having a Spleen – Davy was telling me about it and the stem cell stuff. He and Hamo are great when it comes to my ailments and the do’s and don’ts. Davy gets his stuff off Julie who is an ex Nurse and has an extensive knowledge of Nursey things. Hamo is Googly boy and will look up cancery stuff and tell me what’s what. I don’t bother reading the stuff the hospital give me, mainly because I struggle to see wee writing, even with the reading specs. I’m just counting down to the day when they tell me I’m F–ked and beyond help. So, I’ll plead with them to let me go on holiday. It’s Bingstock on Saturday and I’m looking forward to it, hugely. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to open the proceedings as I was very kindly asked to do. I have had a lot of problems with my Mouth and Throat recently and struggle to speak sometimes and being in front of Hundreds of people isn’t the place to struggle to speak when that’s just exactly what you have to do.  I treated myself to a bit of retail therapy today. I bought ‘The best of the Commodores’, mainly for ‘Easy’ – well, only for ‘Easy’, to be honest, and it was only £2.99. I also bought Pink Floyds ‘Atom Heart Mother’, at the more inflated price of £12.99 and First impressions are good but I’ll have to listen to it a few more times to become familiar with it. I’m less keen on the post ‘Dark side of the Moon’ Pink Floyd- I think that, apart from ‘Wish You Were Here’ and ‘Shine on Crazy Diamond, the ‘Wish You Were Here album is a let down. ‘Animals’ is a bit boring in places and if you take out ‘Comfortably Numb’, ‘Hey You’, ‘Vera’, ‘Run Like Hell and ‘Another Brick in the Wall’ [ the single ] from ‘The Wall you’re left with a lot of pretentious Shite – but that’s just my opinion – I always preferred to watch the Film on Magic Mushrooms or Acid rather than listen to the album. As well as ‘Atom Heart Mother’ my pre ‘Dark Side of the Moon’ Pink Floyd CD’s are ‘Meddle’ [ my favourite], ‘Obscured by Clouds’, and ‘Ummagumma’. I also ordered a sound track with a Birdy song on it I like. I joked with the assistant that I’ve got quite into Birdy recently, having bought her Second and Third CD’s – add to that the fact that I’ve been listening to a live Leonard CohenCD  quite a lot recently and that’s a lot of Three o’ clock in the morning slash yer wrist stuff, but it’s not all doom and gloom and there are upbeat, catchy songs among them, too. On the food front I bought a big bit of Cod that will do me tomorrow as well, Broccoli, Red Onions, coriander, and Rice. I put a fair bit of Coriander in with the Broccoli along with some Pepper and Salt and some Turmeric. To the Rice I added some Salt, Pepper, chopped onion, Turmeric, Lemon Juice and Lime Juice. I  fired the Cod into the Fanny assisted oven, along with some chopped Red Onion, chopped Garlic, chopped Coriander, Lemon and Lime Juice, Salt and Pepper and Two chopped Tomato Halves. After that I had some Colombian Coffee and Walnut cake with some Madagascar Vanilla Custard and Blueberries and Raspberries. I had a nice cup of Assam Tea and a Chivas Regal and Ginger Ale to finish off. It’s Davy’s Birthday tomorrow and I Want to get him a cup of Tea and a Cake.

The cancer Diaries -12,5,16

What a glorious week we’ve had, weather wise. I got a wee bottle of Baby Bio for my plants but ah canny get the C–t open. From about half Three till sunset I get the sun in the living room window and the plants love it – so, I thought a wee feed would do them good. Anyway, I’ll have to wait till Saturday now when  Chrissy Thrower comes through to Livi and she’ll know how to open the plant food. Chris could grow Orchids in a freezer. I’m hoping to get some Lemon Balm and Borage – Balm for Tea and Borage for being pretty. I had a nice dinner today – Three Cocodamols for my starter, smoked Cod with a slice of Tomato and knob of butter cooked in the oven along with roasted red, yellow and green peppers, a chopped Tomato, Lime and Lemon juice and a spoonful of honey and salt and pepper – it was the business. I had sliced Jersey Royal tatties, as well. For my last course I had Blueberries and Raspberries in some Strawberry Yoghurt. I managed a wee wander round Livi Centre today, although I was struggling to begin with and thought I’d made a big mistake, I got a second wind and was fine after that. The leg was a bit sore when I put weight on it but it was more the draining effect of the chemo that I was feeling and getting up the stairs when I got home was an ordeal. I’ve got this nose thing going on at the moment, too, which is getting on ma Tits. Every time I blow my nose I’m bringing out a not inconsiderable amount of blood on the tissue – every Fifth or Sixth blow and I can feel a thud on the tissue as this scary lump clot of blood or snot or brain appears. The Doctor said not to worry as my blood test results have been better than they have been for a while, but, sometimes it can be quite disconcerting to see the equivalent of the First day of the Battle of the Somme in your hanky. I get my big scan next Friday [20th] – chest, abdomen and hips and within Ten days I will know whether it’s get busy living or get busy dying. In January I ordered the ‘Steel magnolias’ sound track and ‘Four Scottish Dances ‘ by Sir Malcolm Arnold from HMV. They phoned last week to say they were both unavailable and today, with the refund I bought ‘Obscured by clouds’ by Pink Floyd. I’ve got a few pink Floyd CD’s – Ummagumma, Meddle, Dark side of the Moon, Wish you were here, Animals and The Wall. If I could only take Two to a Desert Island it would have to be Dark side of the Moon and Meddle.

The cancer Diaries -9,5,16

While browsing on the Pumphy history site ‘’ I noticed that the BBC are doing a series on Aphrodisiacs in food and they discovered ‘Mary Berry’s Dirty Cakes’ in the National Library. This was thought to have been long lost, in fact, some scholars disputed it’s existence in the first place – it finally proves Mary, Queen of cakes, is a lot older than she lets on. The book has been Caramel dated to 1480 and this would make Mary, Duchess of Muffins, a few years older than what her Bus pass is saying. She was unavailable for comment this morning but  left a tray of freshly baked ‘Casanova Croissants'[ from her book] for the reporters outside.

The cancer Diaries -7,5,16

This time last year I was waking up in Bordeaux at about the same time as Scotland was waking up to an SNP landslide in the Westminster election. Yesterday I woke up to the Tory party being the official opposition in Scotland. I don’t know what shocked me more. If, Twenty years ago, you had said to someone, anyone, that the SNP would be the Country’s leading political party and the Tories would be the main opposition party, there would have been a phone call and within Fifteen minutes men in white coats would have been administering a Coma inducing injection of Largactol and the person would have slipped out of society, never to be seen again on account of being a dafty. It’s a sad day for the Labour party – Keir Hardie, Nye Bevan, Michael Foot and Tony Benn will be turning in their graves. The Scottish Labour party has been destroyed by the Central belt Mafia over the last Sixty years and as a result we now have the Tories as the main opposition party. From now on Scottish politics will just turn into another Northern Ireland with the God save the Queen, Union Jack wavers on One side and the Nationalists on the other. Ibrox on match day will resemble Trafalgar square on VE day and this will spread until it gets out of hand. === Anyway, I got more chemo yesterday – felt shite before and after it. My hair is beginning to turn that pre fall out way and there are wee aches and pains. I got stuff to read on the stem cell treatment and if I’m well enough to have the procedure it won’t be easy. They said I would be in Hospital for at least a couple of weeks and that as well as being effed physically it also eff’s you mentally.

The cancer Diaries -3,5,16

I’ve noticed out my window that the Buds and Leaves of Summer are making a similar sprint finish to the middle of May like they did last year. No magpies nesting this year outside but there are Three plump Pigeons that eat all the bread I put out for them. It’s almost a year since the ‘Girondin de Ecosse’ were in Bordeaux for the Adieu L’escure and Davy and I will be back in just over a Month. I think the chemo will have kicked in by then [ I can notice the changes already] but I think I’ll be a bit fitter and stronger than I was last year. I’m Two stones heavier, which cant be bad and in all likelihood this time last year the cancer was in it’s infancy and the Heart attack was just a few Months away – so, short of dying, I’m hoping to be in a better place health wise in Bordeaux this time around. Weirdly, Doctor McNeil has just phoned me to tell me that Doctor Jacobs, the Heart specialist is happy with the state of my Heart and is happy for me to go ahead with the stem cell treatment. However, I have a CT scan in a couple of weeks and it’s big stuff – they will know from that if I can get the stem cell treatment. I think it all comes down to how aggressive the cancer is. Only another couple of weeks with this daft moon boot, too. My foot and leg are much better now and walking about isn’t too much hassle. It will be good to get into jeans, though, after what has seemed ages. I hate Tracky bottoms. So, it’s blood samples on Thursday and more chemo on Friday and the point of no return in Three weeks time.