Monthly Archives: July 2020

The Telly hasny been workin  for a week or Two so ah’ve been listening tae a lot of Music and ah’ve been enjoyin’ makin’ ‘Spotify’ playlists. Ah’ve got one playlist called ‘Classical and Film Music and there’s aboot Six ‘oors of stuff on it. Ah think ah might have tae put them in separate playlists. Ah remember the auld Nescafe advert wi ‘Morning Mood’ for it’s Music. Ah didny know that, at the time,  but Auld Scud knew, though, and he went one better by showin’ me and playin me an LP it was on. Edvard Grieg was the Composers name and he was ma introduction intae the world of Classical music. Auld Scud had a box set of Classical stuff and there was a booklet in it that gave ye a wee History of the featured Composers, when they were born, when they died, and stuff in between. At that age [ aboot Nine or Ten ] ah was an avid reader and ah read  the booklet and discovered names like, Tchaikovsky, Rachmananov, Borodin, Berlioz , Bizet. Ah had the good fortune to be aware of some fantastic Classical music when ah was younger. The 1812 Overture, William Tell Overture, Carmen, Danse Macabre, Donald where’s yer Troosers?, played at 78rpm, or 16rpm. Even back then ah was obsessed by how old folk were when they died and ah had the composers in order of longevity. Even now when ah read aboot somebody, ah’ll see maybe 17 89- 1820 and think ‘Fuck sake, was it worth it’. Then ah might see 1820- 1910 [ as was the case wi’ Florence Nightingale and think ‘ Good on ye, well done’. Anyway,  that’s the Classical and Film music – ah lumped them the gither [‘together’, for posh talkers ] because ah think yer Filmy boys are like the auld Composers. Georges Delerue,[ Steel Magnolias, Her Alibi ], John Williams [ Dances with Wolves ], Ennio Morricone[ Once upon a time in the West, Once upon a time in America ] -that, tae me, is modern classical music. Despite aw that guid music ah miss the Telly a wee bit, especially the Weather. BBC Scotland have got big Judith and Kawser, who wid get a free pie at a Pumphy Juniors game, easy. BBC 1 have got Louise Lear, though, she’d get a free pie at the Theatre of Bings, or Recreation Park – or ‘The Track’ tae give it it’s proper name. Rastafarian roll up time. The Photy was taken just a few Hours after ma Heart attack in 2015.

It’s never endin’ wi these wee C–ts  next door. Aw day Saturday, Three times on Sunday and every day this week, the Polis have been here tryin’ to sort some disturbance. One of the Three lassies who lives there was being escorted by a couple of Polis, laughin’ up at her pals in the flat sayin’ ‘Ah’m gettin’ lifted’. Ah thought tae masel  she’ll no’ be laughin’ if she ends up  sharin’ a holdin’ cell wi Two Women Rugby players who’ve no’ had a fight or a shag for a Fortnight. The Tranquilisers help, of that ah’ve no doubt, but they canny half zonk ye oot [ ah could say they can’t half zonk one out, but, Fuck that], and it takes a good Hour to fully wake up. The thing is that ah take Two of the Woodstocks [ Fluoxetine] when ah get up and they mellow me oot, tae the point where ah canny be ersed daein’ anything except get stoned. Ah get a bit stressed wi’ the C–ts next door and wish the problem would go away. That’s where a couple of big butch Women Rugby players  who’ve no’ had a fight or a shag for a Fortnight wid come in handy. Ah know that’s no’ very PC, but ah think the PC world has created C–ts like the C–ts next door. They get a Fuckin’ sweetie and a hug at School if they’re bein’ wee C–ts these days and aw the blame gets shifted on tae the parents- or their uncle Jimmy or Gary for shaggin’ them when they were wee. Ah wid hate tae be involved in somebody gettin’ evicted but ah’m on the verge of writin’ a letter tae the Cooncil or ma Two MP’s Hannah and Bardella to see if they can dae anything aboot it. Just got a text there tellin’ me that Man City have beaten Liverpool. Time for a break.