Polis

A few months back at Fort Apache, the Drive, when the wee Cunt next door was attractin’ the Polis every Five minutes, ah got a knock on ma door One night after a particularly noisy evenin’. Ah opened the door and the Polis were there- Three of them. The guy who knocked ma door was obviously a man on a mission who wisny goin’ home without arrestin’ people. Ah found his manner somewhat confrontational, for a member of the Gestapo, but, lookin’ at him, ah could see where aw this quiet rage was comin’ fae. He was a Cunt who obviously got bullied when he was at School. He was aboot ma height and he had what must’ve been the World’s strongest prescription glasses ah’ve ever seen- the Two lenses were full of eye- if ah’d got a shot of them ah wid’ve probably seen water on Mars. It got me thinkin’ aboot the Polis and what percentage of them got bullied when they were young and was this was their way of gettin’ back at the bullies. Ah always thought that the entry exam tae the Polis was made up of just Two questions- Are ye a Bawbag wi’ nae mates ?. If ye answered yes tae them both ye were in. Ah always thought that  Karate folk are a bit like the Polis- Ninety Five per cent Bawbags wi’ the odd good guy thrown in. Most of the Karate folk ah’ve met or known were awfy Bawbags- aw obsessed wi’ their Martial Art and the smug knowledge that they can knock Fuck oot ye, Cunt’s.    Anyway, ah was at Kelty on Saturday passed watchin’ the Kelty Hearts play Annan Athletic in the Scottish League Two top of the table clash. Kelty won 2-1 in front of a great wee crowd. Ah felt it comin’ back home after the game. Ah got dropped off at the shop – it’s no’ far fae ma flat and ah thought ah’d get ma shoppin’ and stroll doon leisurely tae Castle Scud. By Fuck, was ah wrong. Ah was totally effed when ah got the few Hundred yards back tae the flat. Ah had tae stop Four or Five times. It despairs me, bein’ almost crippled wi’ this Shite circulation but it’s of ma own ma makin’ Ah have tae give up smokin’ but ah just dinny think ah’ve got the will power- ah love bein’ stoned, so the edible route seems tae be the best option. Anyway, more tomorrow or later.

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